Let’s face it. Results day isn’t going to go to plan for everyone and after the 18 months that our outgoing A level (and GCSE) students have had it’s a miracle they’ve even got here. So instead of focusing on the talk of ‘inflated results’ or the whispers of ‘they had it easier than in my day’, we ought to celebrate that they got here and that their life will be constructed of a different set of experiences to those of us much older than them.
We see it everywhere. Results don’t define who you are. Take Holly Tucker - she got an E in business A level and yet has gone on to build a multi million pound business that many of us could only dream of creating. Or Richard Branson - the epitome of character and drive over grades and schooling.
So what happens if your child (or you) hasn’t got the grades ‘they need’? As an entrepreneur who never wanted to go to uni but went because it was ‘the done thing’ and consequently failed a module each year, this is my advice.
Rewrite the definition of failure. In my (humble) opinion rewriting failure is one of the most effective things we can do to change the way we see life, our challenges and the things that fall across our path. Failure gets me so riled up. It makes me so mad that we perceive it to be a thing. For me it’s not an option because you cannot fail. When something happens there are two possible outcomes. Either you win or you learn. So if they didn’t get the results they needed then think:
What can be learnt from this?
What lesson is wrapped up in the current situation?
The world has a funny way of showing us the things that really matter.
Get a job. Lack of purpose is the biggest destroyer of motivation so if all of your child's friends have 6 weeks left of summer before heading to university, challenge them to get themselves a job by the time their friends head off. Contrary to what we might instinctively think Brexit and Covid are playing into favour for the Gap Year / student market in terms of job opportunities; the hospitality industry is booming and they are understaffed, meaning wages are increasing and if so for those with drive and an eagerness to learn, they’ll be snapped up in no time. Childcare is stronger than ever before and with the reduction in au pairs more families are seeking UK nationals to help with their children. Consider the Freckles Junior Nanny Course to kickstart a nannying career (they have an 80% employment rate within 4 weeks of graduation). Supermarkets and retail are also great places to look as many of their staff will be heading back to university, thus opening opportunities for someone looking to step into the workforce.
Take a breather and set a goal. University and grades are not what will get your child to where they want to be, it’s their drive, determination and clarity over what they ultimately want that will get them there. Of course if they want to be a Doctor then they need to get the grades to get into uni. If that’s them then they need to set that as their goal. The first thing to do is to figure out what their goal is: going to uni, spending some time traveling or getting a job? Decide what it is and work backwards. How long have they got, how much money do they need, what grades do they need to get? They don’t need to know every step on the journey to achieve that goal but they do need to know where they’re going. If it’s going to uni and they missed a place this year because of slipping a grade or two then call the uni and see if they can hold a place for 2022 or 2023 on the basis they’ll get the grades needed. Universities are massively oversubscribed this year and so will no doubt be open to a discussion of a delay or two. If it’s going traveling, figure out where they want to go, how much they need and what the current restrictions are so that they can begin to make plans. If it’s getting a job then get them to start with step 2 to get the money coming in and then narrow down their industry, get their CV prepped and go and knock on some doors (both literally and figuratively). I’m still always surprised at how many jobs are gained through knocking on doors and putting yourself out there…
My hope is that we realise that grades do not define us. They are not what will make us a success, bring us joy or ultimately make us happy. They just dominate at certain times in our lives. So remember, whatever grades your child got know that they have either won or they have learnt something. Both of which are commendable, both of which can be celebrated, both of which will impact their life.